Terpsichorean Paraplegia

No lights

2007-02-27T00:45:00.000Z

Some days
you stop at the kerb
of every road you come to
waiting for the cars to stop
waiting for the lights to change
waiting for a gap in the traffic
but there is no break
and nobody brakes
nobody stops and waves
to let you cross
and the cars stream past
car after car after car
on and on and on
until some kind soul stops
waves, and beeps the horn
but you're lost
motionless
hypnotised by the stream of cars
and with a curse and a frown
the kind soul moves on
and the cars stream past
car after car after car

Like silk; love silk; set silk free.

2007-01-15T22:23:00.000Z

A few days short of six months since my last entry here. That's about long enough, isn't it?

For years now I haven't been eating meat, and having very little other animal-based foodstuffs; not many eggs, and then only free-range; not much dairy, and then only from cattle stocks with low-impact karma (basically, most dairy cattle are culled when their commercial usefulness has ended; I make sure all the dairy I consume comes from cows who are treated well in life, and allowed to die naturally). As well as that, I don't support other non-food industries that involve the suffering and death of animals: no leather, no suede, no furs, etc. I've only just discovered, however, that silk is another thing that should be in that list.

Of course, I was aware that silk was farmed from animals, but what I didn't know was that the harvest involved the death of the silkworm larvae. This is not something I can be comfortable with; it's especially bad as I'm rather fond of silk clothing. It was easy to remove leather from my life - shoes of rubber or canvas, bags of hemp, etc - but silk might be a bit harder to remove. Fortunately, synthetic silk is available, but it's one more thing to watch out for when shopping; one more concern to have.

Did you know that silk was formerly used as a type of armour? Because it happens to be the strongest natural fabric known to man, it proves itself useful in stopping arrows from seriously damaging a person: if there is silk being worn, the arrow would push in, still managing to break the skin, but the silk would not be damaged. This would facilitate the removal of the arrow, and also helped prevent infection in the wound. All those silkworms died to protect men of war.

Indoor shower, indoor sea

2006-07-21T21:05:00.000Z

Ever since getting a chair for use in it, I've been having several showers a day. I'm telling myself it's solely for the purposes of keeping cool in this oppressive heat, as I haven't done any actual washing in there yet (neither my body nor the dishes). Several years have passed since I was obsessive about keeping clean. I would have several washes and baths a day, but that, thankfully, has been cut right down. Having a shower - quick, easy, economical - newly returned to my list of options is a mixed blessing. When the summer has stepped down from its pedestal - this is high summer indeed - I shall hopefully limit my showers to a morning and an evening, to clean my body, nothing more; and I shall continue with my midday baths, for the purpose of getting thoroughly clean. I look forward to it. Until then, keep clean, keep cool. I know I will!

Don't vegetables feel pain too?

2006-07-20T12:32:00.000Z

One of the questions asked of vegetarians concerns the death or suffering of plants. How can I, avoiding karma negatively influencing my future life/lives by not causing pain or death in an animal, justify causing pain and death to a plant?

Firstly, a plant's nervous system, if we can call it that, is not as advanced as that of an animal. But this alone isn't justification enough. Still the plant suffers, still the plant dies, still that suffering appear on my karmic record. My solution is to offer first the food to the Lord Krsna. By having my food blessed by the process of offering it into the presence of God, the karmic reaction is reduced to zero. The Lord cancels out the suffering; He knows about it, therefore He, who controls karma - in fact karma is a part of His universal body - can protect our souls, our futures, from the negativity created by causing suffering in another lifeform.

It is God in his infinite love that supplied this food for us, therefore we must thank Him.

A magic penny.

2006-06-26T21:14:00.000Z

I give to the homeless.

I give money directly to the homeless person, despite the recommendations of the homeless charities, and I also give money to the charities. The charities provide, with my money and the money of others, food and shelter for the homeless. The money I give directly - that's for the recipient to decide. I don't drink and I don't take drugs - I don't agree with drinking or taking drugs - but if that's his or her choice, then so be it. If it's what makes him happy, if it's her way of blocking out the pain and the sadness, then so be it.

I am confident, though, that many of the people on the streets are interested at least on some level in improving their situation - in staying alive rather than blocking life out. They buy food, they buy a new blanket, they buy shelter for a night.

But there is more one can give to the homeless. Not just money - you can buy food for them, or buy the new blanket. I've done this, too, and I have also on occasion sat down with them, and been an ear willing to listen. People need food and warmth and comfort - but they also need companionship. Friendship. Love.

Thus spake Zarathustra

2006-06-22T22:48:00.000Z

I made it into town today - a few days too late for the Rathayatra, but not to worry...

I was on a mission. My mission, if I chose to accept it, and as it was me assigning it, I was more than ready to accept it, was to find a book on the subject of Zoroastrianism, buy a copy of Anoushka Shankar's latest CD, and eat in Govinda's restaurant.

Govinda's was a success; it hasn't moved from the last time I was there. Wonderful food, it really is! Anoushka was also a success - an expensive success, but a success nonetheless. And the book on Zoroastrianism? I went to two of the biggest bookshops London has to offer, and there was nothing, not even a pamphlet. This isn't going to turn into a story of someone finding something in a smaller shop. I tried some of those as well, and still nothing. It was an idle search before, a curiosity to fill a gap on my shelves. Now it's turned into a real mission - must find! I don't want to have to resort to online shopping...

birth

2006-06-21T21:00:00.000Z

Here's a poem I wrote earlier this year. It was universally misunderstood and misinterpreted. I gave it the title "birth", and that's what threw people off the scent. One clue: it's not about giving birth, or being born.

she closes up but she cannot contain
the torrent that threatens to tear her apart.
for a moment, too brief, far too brief,
a moment that passes in the blink of an eye;
for a moment, she keeps it all dammed in,
but a sob escapes, then a wail, and more.
the pain is astounding, the anger too.
the fury, she is overwhelmed, it flows on,
on and over her, she cannot keep up.
it washes over her, and she drowns, she sinks.
she's in her next life.

Any ideas?

Chant and be happy

2006-06-18T16:49:00.000Z

You can chant the Hare Krsna mahamantra (Hare Krsna, Hare Krsna, Krsna Krsna, Hare Hare / Hare Rama, Hare Rama, Rama Rama, Hare Hare) at any time, and in any place. Although you can chant it alone (japa), it is most certainly best to do it in a group (kirtana). Why?

Observe any group of people engaged in the same activity: go to a football match, or a rock concert, or a political convention. The audience in each of these things are gathered for the same reason - to support their team, their favourite musicians, or their politicians of choice. They will join in cheering, applauding and singing along. Any one of them will tell you that it is better to be there, with their fellow supporters, than to be at home alone watching it on the television. It is the same with chanting, not just the Hare Krsna mahamantra, but any chant, mantra or hymn.

Shouting out support for your football team raises the players' morale, and also promotes and cultivates a feeling of camaraderie between the individual members of the crowd. Similarly, to sing the mahamantra in a group, one feels part of an alliance of like-minded people, and also shows to the Lord that you do indeed love Him, which is what He deserves in return for what we have received by His grace.

petal

2006-06-18T16:44:00.000Z

try to hold on
to keep your grip on the petals
keep the perfume in your nose
it reminds you of the day...

...the day before the day after
when towering men marched out
and trampled the flowers down
now all you have left is...

...memories of petals and perfume
leaves that fell and wrinkled
they died, returned to the soil
the soil, like sand, that falls

through your fingers, counting down
seconds pass, seconds fall
minutes pass, minutes fall
the hour comes, the perfume is gone

and the stench of death is strong.

Rathayatra 2006

2006-06-18T15:29:00.000Z

I didn't go after all. Without going into details, I didn't feel up to it. Disappointing, frustrating... but there's always the Brighton one in a couple of months' time. I tried using the BBC's London "jam cams" to spy on proceedings, but the best I got was a glimpse of a few possible attendees on the edge of Trafalgar Square... and some messages telling me that the cameras along the route were out of action for some of the time. Tarnations!

The Absence

2006-06-15T00:07:00.000Z

The absence of sound is crushing -
a ferocious gale of louring silence,
it deafens; or that's how it feels -
ears become useless as eyes take control:

The absence of darkness and light -
a sightless vortex of nothing,
as far as the eyes can see, in blindness -
eyes become useless as mind takes control:

The absence of thought is a sin -
a crime in the midst of the mind,
impulses strike out at nothing -
mind becomes useless as heart takes control.

Rathayatra

2006-06-11T18:36:00.000Z

Next Sunday is the 2006 ISKCON Rathayatra parade in central London. I was proud to be there last year, helping to guide the Lord among the people, and have made plans to do the same again this year... I took some photos last year. Above shows the three chariots in Hyde Park before setting off. The crowd surrounding them is only a tiny fraction of the mass that eventually accompanied the chariots through the streets, all chanting the maha mantra... You don't have to be a devotee already to come along, everyone is welcome! God does not discriminate. Hare Krsna!

Plagiarists please derive carefully!

2006-06-09T21:29:00.000Z

Several of the last few books I've read have had some element to them of the sexualisation of children and minors. Both of the books I'm slowly writing also feature this in some form. I'm starting to feel like a plagiarist! But at least I know that I had plotted these books long before I read any of the others. Seeing, however, as one of those was Vladimir Nabokov's Lolita, I shouldn't really be surprised...

Aforth! (and a timely shower)

2006-06-08T21:54:00.000Z

A Star, he danced cross hills and streams,
Bringing now his Light; now his Dark -
But then! Afore his eyes saw the Star a frame:
On that frame, a man - Star hark:

"Aforth!" crieth the Star "Tis positing;
Aye, my darling, posed unseemly my mood!
Let us - shall we? - aye, for tis the time
Myself, but, the Star, I am... ve'rude!

"What! What is this? Do I see; yes, yes!
A shower; a timely shower indeed, oh!
For these drops; they fall; oh my Saviour
Brung aforth! Aforth! I cry: my credo!"

The Star he did fall; and fall did he far
No more could he see - no, nevermore -
For what didst he see? Nought but a tear!
And they dragged him down to the floor...

A tear, shed, for the corruption of sin
Upon that frame! An ending, a start;
But for the Star, bringing the Light:
"Oh, my darling! Pared from thine heart!"

You are the best devotee.

2006-06-08T21:23:00.000Z

From a conversation between A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada, founder-acarya of the International Society for Krishna Consciousness, better known as the Hare Krishna society, and one Bob Cohen, a Peace Corps worker in the 1970s:

Srila Prabhupada: [...] I don't consider myself the best devotee. I am the lowest.
Bob Cohen: No!
Srila Prabhupada: You are the best devotee.
Bob Cohen: Oh, no, no! What you say always seems right, so you must be the best devotee.
Srila Prabhupada: The thing is that even the best devotee comes to the second-class platform when he preaches.
Bob Cohen: What would the best devotee be doing?
Srila Prabhupada: The best devotee does not preach.
Bob Cohen: What does he do?
Srila Prabhupada: He sees that there is no need of preaching. For him, everyone is a devotee.

"From above, we all look like ants."

2006-06-06T19:07:00.000Z

Oh ant, chief ant, you're crawling low
beneath a bush, hid from Lord Sun;
His heat; His light; and heaven's glow;
Your soldier ants, their fighting done,
are damned from now to the end of days
for following orders and your word;
And Lord Sun beats with His hot rays
upon their heads; oh ant, unstirred,
if you truly care about their lives,
give new orders: turn, and rout,
return, soldier ants, to your hives;
It's not cowardice, the truth will out:
the bush is burning bright enough
to hide Lord Sun's eternal light
for now; But soon, in just a puff,
the bush will die, and what's right
will come to be once more for all;
Chief ant, you stay beneath the bush
but you'll never hear another call,
you'll pass on, and Lord Sun will push
once more across a deep blue sky
and shine His light upon the ground,
but it's up to us if we shall die,
if we fade away without a sound.

God Among Us

2006-06-06T18:54:00.000Z

4.5 The Personality of Godhead said: Many, many births both you and I have passed. I can remember all of them, but you cannot, O subduer of the enemy!
4.6 Although I am unborn and My transcendental body never deteriorates, and although I am the Lord of all living entities, I still appear every millennium in My original transcendental form.
4.7 Whenever and wherever there is a decline in religious practice, O descendant of Bharata, and a predominant rise of irreligion - at that time I descend Myself.
4.8 To deliver the pious and to annihilate the miscreants, as well as to reestablish the principles of religion, I Myself appear, millennium after millennium.

- Bhagavad Gita As It Is

We, as humans, are blessed to have such close attention from our Lord. But why do we need reminding so often of His messages and His love? Why does religious practice decline? Why do we forget? Why - although we are lucky that He comes to remind us - do we slide so far from what He has told us and what He has delivered to us? Why are we so ungrateful to He who created us with love?

dream holiday

2006-06-04T22:22:00.000Z

passport passed around
the sound
of laughter lifting up
describes the flush
the blush
on your face, you redden
hold out your hand, demand
the book
take it back, no turning back
through the door, you're sure
the plane
is waiting for you, but then you see
the runway's empty, run away
the dream
your dream holiday, just that
a dream, and nothing more it seems
the laughs
were because you had nowhere to go.

Asleep in the park.

2006-06-04T22:08:00.000Z

Have you ever fallen asleep in the park, or on the beach, or in some other public place? Revealing such a private activity - there is nothing more private - to anyone who cares to walk past takes some courage. It's easy to do. Just find a spot, on the grass, away from the footpaths, away from the boys playing football, away from the flock of hungry pigeons, and settle down. Close your eyes. Sleep.

The sun beats down on you, warm as a blanket, the wind ruffles your hair. Someone strolls across the grass, comes within a few metres. You don't notice, you don't care; you're asleep. You dream. Are the dreams any different?

Waking up - the sun is still there, the wind continues. Across the park are the boys playing football and the flock of hungry pigeons. Nothing is any different - except you. You slept!

Terpsichorean Paraplegia

2006-01-30T23:32:00.000Z

There's always something pleasing about seeing someone dancing. Dancing doesn't have to be done with the body - some people don't have bodies with which to dance. One can dance in the mind, one can dance with the voice, one can commit their dance to paper. You might call that poetry...